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Macleans.ca

Canada’s magazine

Econowatch

The new normal: Call it frugality if you like. We call it sanity.

pursuant to paragraph (iv), subsection 37-f, the cable guy takes off his pants

Warning! This post – which features excerpts from Playboy’s quarterly filing to the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission – contains some risqué language and terminology related to straight and homosexual sex (though no outright profanity). So please stop reading if you don’t want to hear about bums and stuff.

playboy’s finances: soft, limp – are you getting the comparative image I am trying to evoke? – drooping, flaccid, a non-erect penis…

It has been revealed that Playboy is losing money. Playboy! You might ask yourself: how does a company lose a million dollars a month publishing pictures of buck-naked ladies? Did futures contracts for crotchless underwear abruptly skyrocket? Has the shady cartel controlling the production of silicone gel ruthlessly scaled back implant production? Did Charlie Sheen allow his 2,000 subscriptions to lapse?